I know

I know im not a kind of extrovert one. i dont know since when, i enjoy myself being alone, talking to myself, overthink in silence, going anywhere by myself, keeping everything just in me, myself.

I know, some people think it is boring to be me, kinda introvert, not a funny one. But i find it is good somehow. I believe eventhough human need others as a social being, they also need time to be alone.

I know, im not a good speaker. I cannot tell people exactly what i thought what i mean, some people usually misunderstand me. Im better in silence, talking to myself, keeping everything alone.

I know, not everytime im being like this, but i know i spent many times being like this rather than going out socially.

I know, no, i dont know, what exactly what people expect from me. When im start talking, giving my opinion, they dont listen. And when im listening, they blame me for not talking. Hello, i used to talk and u just dont want to listen. Im exactly talking what u are saying about!

I know, im mad, im disappoint, im tired. But i know, these make me learn.

I know world is not a peaceful place to stay. People jerk, people good.

I know im not supposed to be like this, but i need to let it all out. Im not a good speaker, then lemme try as a writer.

All the things that press me will make me stronger, yes i know, i know that bullshit for sure, for real. But for now, i just wanna complain. 

just pardon me this time, to complain, to be mad, and to think. something better left unsaid, kept deep inside, as a secret. Because i know, it is hurt when i tell people, they can hear, but they cant understand.